Monday, December 20, 2010

Dueling Statues

Okay, most likely you don't give a fuck. I get it.

Still, it bugs me that when people think Statue of a Fool, they think Ricky Van Shelton, with his little pig-eyes and his gynormous head, instead of Brian Collins, who has a much better intuitive understanding of the material, and who really nails that motherfucker at the end, you know? Not fucking fair, is all I'm sayin.

Now, I know what lazy motherfuckers y'all are. Don't bother denying it, alright, cause I'm the one's gotta post all these videos all the time, cause y'all can't be trusted to follow a link—Oh, no, might sprain one of your precious little fingers or something—might not be able to text for a few hours, or twitter your every fucking brain-fart and then where the fuck would the world be, right?

So, yeah. I'm sympathetic. Just this once, though—puh-leeeeeze?—follow this link:

—After you've watched old scrunch-eyes sing it again (below), and then you tell me which one is better. Now, not only do you have to follow the link, you have to scroll down just a little, and click on the song (Statue of a Fool, if your attention is wandering). So, maybe set your cell-phone down, just for a moment or two? Gather your senses. Then, listen, and let the transcendence of it sorta wash over you. Maybe leave ol Brian a note letting him know you recognize the utter superiority of his version, compared to old lantern-head.

You'll feel better about yourself, and the world around you, too.

(Go to it—I can't very well click the fucking thing for you, can I?)

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